师兄买猪肉

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师兄是天津人。他出身不好,从小父母下干校的干活。他受不了
在干校被人欺负的羞辱,便自己逃回天津老家。他靠给人送报纸活了下来。

读研时他想把辛酸的往事忘掉。有了工资,他离开了贫穷,但贫穷从没有离开他。说的就是即使他脱贫了,可他那穷人的思维行为改不了。这话用英文可能易懂。He got out of poverty;But poverty couldn’t get out of him.

1.咸菜太太

食堂的早餐多数是米粥加咸菜。有一天津人就在一窗口专卖咸菜。一分钱菜票给你一筷子咸菜。师兄先跟老乡套近乎:“老乡见老乡,两眼泪汪汪。”咸菜太太绝不殉私情。师兄说“一分钱咸菜但要两样。”咸菜太太要多小气有多小气,她一琢磨这没法掌握怕我师兄占了便宜。就告诉他,两样就得交两分钱,一分钱一样。二人吵了起来。

里边的经理出来批评了咸菜太太,说食堂上个月还有盈余,一分钱可给两样咸菜。

2.我喝汤

研究生院弄到了一新的大楼。是单元套房,有厨房厕所。但学生们都吃食堂。

有一年中秋节,同学们决定把厨房用起来。每人自报奋勇做什么菜。大家在一起吃喝玩乐。人人都报了要做的菜。最后一位哥们说他买一只老母鸡。那年头老母鸡很贵,大家觉得俺师兄还没说他做什么菜就让他俩分摊那老母鸡的钱。师兄不说话,那位哥们就说俺一人买就行了。这时俺师兄说话了:“你放肉,我加水;到时你们吃肉,我喝汤。”

3。来点油

那年头买肉排队。大冬天的师兄冻得直跺脚。北京的冬天很冷。等到排到师兄了,卖肉的拿著砍刀问他要几斤。师兄说要八分钱的。因为每斤八毛五。买一两四舍五入就是九分钱。这亏师兄是不能吃的。买八分钱的肉那就得给一两,师兄那么算计著。卖肉师傅以为没听懂,又问了他一句:“八、八、八分钱的?”师兄点了头。

师傅用刀给拉了一块,刚下手师兄说话了:“来点肥的来点瘦的。”那师傅只好把刀又歪了一下,就在这时,师兄又补了一句:“再来点油!”那师傅说别称了,肯定二两开外!

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